when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
