You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
