ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
