At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Randomize
