is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
