The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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