If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
