My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
