thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
