Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
