just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Randomize