Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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