OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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