Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I have aggressive nipples.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
