He told me they were just razor bumps!
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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