How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
