i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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