I just pynch a tree in the face
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
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