And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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