i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
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