seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I wear drunk well.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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