I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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