We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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