Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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