So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Randomize
