I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
