Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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