i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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