Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize
