Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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