nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
NoShamevember. You game?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
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