Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
My penis needs a shock collar
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize