I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
