bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
She has the best kind of daddy issues
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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