He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
