and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Randomize