Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
