grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
