Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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