don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Even my vagina gasped.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
