Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
