okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
