He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
