Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Randomize
