ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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