wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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