Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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