he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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