'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
