operation harelip BJ is a go
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
